The unsettling thing about failure is that nine times out of 10, we don’t realize we are standing in our own way. Self-sabotage can be defined as any behavior that negatively impacts our lives and prevents us from achieving our goals and dreams. Self-sabotage is very damaging and manifests itself in different areas of our lives, negatively impacting work, relationships, or goals we hope to achieve. Even if we happen to be aware that we’re engaging in sabotaging behavior, it can be difficult to stop. But don’t fret! Once we are aware of our damaging tendencies, we can work toward preventing them.
Why We Sabotage Ourselves
We all react to stressors in different ways so it makes sense that each of us self-sabotage for different reasons. But understanding why we interrupt our success can help us prevent these damaging behaviors in the future.
When I think back on the work I do with my clients, fear is the most common reason for self-sabotage. Fear of success or a fear of failing, or both! Another reason is the need for control and wanting to know an outcome before it happens. If we can predict a negative outcome, we can mentally prepare for it. Often times, we cause a negative outcome because it feels safest and at least we know what to expect. Understandably, that is no way to leverage the Law of Attraction
, and all this self-harming behavior creates a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Here are 5 Ways Self-Sabotage Stunts Your Success:
1. You are overly focused on perfection
Achieving perfection is unattainable; it’s that simple! Often times, being overly focused on perfection is a hindrance to achieving anything at all. If you spend your time worrying about making mistakes, you won’t get the opportunity to learn from them and become the best you possible. As an entrepreneur, it’s important to make mistakes. If you live in fear of falling short of being perfect or doing things perfectly, chances are you won’t succeed.
2. You’re comparing yourself to others
As Mark Twain once said, “comparison is the death of joy.” As it turns out, comparing ourselves to other people steals our own happiness as our focus is on what we don’t have rather than what makes us shine. Throw away the comparisons and start focusing on what makes you an incredible entrepreneur and person. Changing your attention to the things that make you great is a sure way to boost your confidence, and confidence is key to success.
3. You throw self-care out the window
When you’re in the throes of growing your business and working hard, the last thing you think about is taking care of your own well-being. But you can’t pour from an empty cup! Over-extending yourself and not knowing when or how to say “no” is sure to lead to burn-out, quickly. When you neglect yourself, it shows, and it produces negative energy that people pick up on. Setting healthy boundaries and scheduling time to take care of your mental, emotional, and physical health is crucial to your success.
4. You put yourself in a box
“Should have” and “could have” are no longer words in your vocabulary! Planning and having goals is important, but if you over-think or generalize the type of person you are or should be or could be, you’ll stagnate your success. You are a multifaceted person who can do anything you put your mind to. Step outside that box to fully appreciate yourself, just as you are, and leverage it to your full advantage!
5. You lack consistency
Consistency is critical to success. While spontaneity and creativity are essential as an entrepreneur, if you lack consistency you won’t accomplish much. Having clear goals and steps in place to achieve them will help you run with your ideas and stay on top of things. Consistency also allows you to pivot and change course quickly (and successfully) in any area of your business when needed. With consistency comes a well-oiled machine, allowing you to focus your energy on the pivot, while everything else is still running smoothly.
Many come to me with behaviors they don’t realize are sabotaging their success. The hardest part is identifying it! If you feel stunted, stagnant, and in a constant cycle of self-sabotage, schedule a Free 30-Minute Talk with Teri. I have availability as early as next week! Let’s identify and unravel any damaging and disruptive behaviors so you can get on a trajectory toward success like you never thought possible.